To All,

This is a post I would give anything to not make. I am not seeking solace or sympathy but feel that this should be told in the event that it may be of benefit someday, to someone.

Our last mare, 26 years old, whose mother and grandmother have been part of my life for the past 41 years, met her end a few nights ago. She had been on a seven day course of Sep LM1. The day of her last dose, her left eye had erupted, lower conjunctiva, looking like a possible puncture, showing as eversion would look. The area over the eye was extremely hot to touch and very swollen. She also had fever of 104.8 F (99 F, norm for horse), thirstless, not sweating though high fever and warm day, pulse twice normal, resp high end normal, no appetite, lethargic, mucus membranes slightly yellowed, dehydrated overall. She was treated with Calendula/hyp MT washes in the eye and Ars 30 in water and ice packs on swelling. (Vet called but not able to come till next day.) I think Bell may have been used later. (Terrible days with much confusion but the remedies and potencies can be verified if needed. Just can't look at the notes this soon.) Vet (next day) seemed not too concerned with eye, left some ointment, orb not affected, he said. Asked if he would take blood for thyroid and do complete workup, as I suspected hypothyroidism. I thought she was verge side of colic but did have gut sounds (good thing) and he said to get her to eat/drink, if possible. Good old allopathic vet shot her up with pain killers (Banamine injectable, left same in paste) and antibiotics (left SMZ, Sulfamethoxazole and Trimethoprim 800mg/160mg). This is not an excuse, it is the truth..if you want a vet to come to the farm, you can not contradict them or they won't come back, particularly since we were now a "one horse farm". Therefore, you can't refuse what they inject or prescribe. You really don't even have the chance to stop them from giving injections. There are very few, 5 to be exact, large animal vets making farm visits in the entire half of our state.

Gave the SMZ a few times but stopped.

Ensuing days saw fluctuating temps, eat/drink only if in my hands, very much wanted to be held and comforted/company, would stand immobile for long periods and then just walk away, going nowhere, just making big circles or following the large pasture fence lines. She was weak, particularly on the first step. Head/nose held up or raised, caused backward staggering with trembling in hind legs. After first steps, she walked forward with free movements and purpose. Then would stop and stand for long periods.

During the next days she was given (all in water, succussed if repeated) Nux V 6C (improvement in stool passed, temp reduced and anxiety relieved). One late night, when in 24 hours she had not produced stool, was groaning and grunting with tensing of body, urine output was limited, gave one dose Puls 200, which stopped the moaning rather quickly.

At one point in the middle one night she was given Apis 30 for continued swelling/heat over eye. As soon as the 3cc dose was in her mouth, she collapsed in a convulsion that included stiffening of limbs and intense rapid/labored breathing. Several drops of Rescue Remedy instantaneously halted the convulsion and stopped the breathing difficulty. She stood back up and though weak, came out of it with no apparent after affects.

One time, she blew blood out her nose with long, stringy clots. Nasal discharge worse left side ( same side as bad eye) changing from thin whitish to thicker yellowish, diminishing toward the end to very minimal.

Her eye condition improved dramatically for a day, then worsened. It was like a lumpy red balloon, protruded about one inch and filled the entire lower lid area. Vet called back. Gave fluids/oils via stomach tube, cortisone shot, Banamine injectable. Tube inserted first into lungs and when retracted tube was filled with yellowish/brown thin fluids. (No coughing.) He said she had a good bit of fluid in the lungs. Her mucus membranes no longer yellow. He felt that she might have a pituitary tumor or possibly trauma to spine/neck, that the eye now looked like possible tumor. His suggestion was to euthanize. Since the word trauma had been introduced, I wanted to try Arnica and Hypericum, so refused. Arn and Hyp were given with no improvement to eye through the day but she seemed better otherwise. Stronger and did eat/drink some. Gave China 30, two doses. Continued to improve in sense of well-being, stronger. Had phone consult with distant homeopathic vet late in day who prescribed a regimen of Arn, then Urtica U, then China...all in 30. I told him she had already had Arn and China that day. He said that was OK but now we were going to give the remedies, one at a time, in two hour intervals, in that order. A total of one dose of each remedy for that evening. Repeat the 2 hour dosing the next two days but to add Nux V along with the other 3 remedies. A follow up was scheduled for three days later. At last I felt hopeful.

Gave Arn and Urtica U as prescribed. She drank water and for the first time in many days, put her head in the feeder to eat on her own. On advice of well respected human homeopath, I substituted the scheduled China dose with Phos Ac 30.

She went into convulsions immediately after giving Phos Ac 30. She fell to her knees, "ran" as fast as if she was galloping while on her side while her whole body shook and convulsed. We have never seen anything as horrible. Her heart rate was too fast to count, her breathing was loud, rapid and very labored, heaving as though she would burst with each breath. She remained flat on her side, with the bad eye down in the straw. She was so violent that I had to keep throwing straw from behind her, where she had paddled at it with her legs and left the bare dirt under her legs. If you can envision a horse galloping, pulling at the earth, that was what she did. She never attempted to get up. The symptoms never abated, until she was finally just too tired to continue to run in place. Her body continued to convulse rigidly after her legs stopped. Her breathing never improved. She lay flat with bad eye in the straw. She was conscious and aware throughout.

Gave her Rescue Remedy, then Camph raw and in potency, then Bell ascending, then Nux V ascending, then Cup M , then Arnica ascending. Nothing changed her extreme convulsions. Gave a dose of Ace Promazine tranquilizer in the jugular which slowed her "running". Gave her Phenobarbital when nothing else helped. Nothing stopped the racking breathing and convulsions. This went on for about 3 hours. Couldn't get a vet to come at 3 AM on a weekend. We shot her in the head. This was the most difficult thing we have ever done in our lives and it will always be deeply regretted. We will never feel it was the right thing to do. We have lived all our lives saving and helping animals. To have done this to our sweet girl is beyond our comprehension. I am certain there was something that could have been done to help her, I just didn't have the knowledge and will never forgive myself for that.

I'm not a homeopath, know very little, have no training at all and am fully aware of my lacking, but have been giving remedies for a number of years, almost daily, sometimes to many different animals daily. I have given 10 and 50 M potencies to very small animals with no discernable aggravations or noticeable or immediate bad effects. I didn't trust my ability to handle this mare's case, so sought professional advice from two sources (one known and trusted, the other the vet consult who was new to me), only giving my own choices (Nux V, Arn, Hyp, Puls) in situations when I couldn't even take the time to try to reach someone.

The only reason I write this is to warn what a little, single, 30C pellet, diluted in water, giving only 3 cc's to a horse weighing 1200 + pounds, can do in the hands of someone who doesn't know how to handle it. I'm in total disbelief, numbed.

EDIT: Thanks for the kind thoughts. For those of you who may have read Anna's post (which I requested she remove) indicating that she felt she may have had some play in this...... I want to make it clear that the only reason for my post was to share the potential actions of a remedy. Anna was accepting responsibility (in her post) which is absolutely unfounded. She owed no apology and that was what I wanted deleted. I could not allow her to discredit herself in anyway. Anna deserves great credit. She tried to help in a case that was completely confused by the drugs given and by my random homeopathic dosing and limited ability to report accurate, timely, information. Though she is much opposed to the mixed up treatment given, she still continued to try to help, which says a great deal about her humanity. She made valid points, in her now deleted post, regarding how a remedy brought about the reaction it did, that may prove helpful for others someday. I hope she again edits her post to include that information because that was the reason for starting the thread. If any fault is to be found it is with me and my ignorance.

[ 14 June 2002, 19:50: Message edited by: gpm ]

__________________
Sometimes on Earth, you can find something that resembles a little piece of Heaven. And sometimes on Earth, a little piece of Heaven can find you.

Wow GPM
That was a heroic effort anyway. ANd i admire the rapidity of observations.
Probably this was something incurable. I'm sorry it had to end like that.
BUT I enjoyed reading your description. Thank you.
doctorleela

__________________
http://www.homeopathy2health.com

Thank you for sharing this tragedy with us. I tend to agree with Dr. Leela, that this was not a curable situation, so grieve of course, but please don't beat yourself up over it. Everyone did the best they knew how under the circumstances. It's often the case that in hindsite we see the forks in the road where we should have turned a different direction, but even so, the roads often lead to the same place.

__________________
Shirley Reischman

Very sorry Gpm.

i withdrew my post at gpm's request.

[ 14 June 2002, 15:59: Message edited by: Anna Bryant ]

Sorry to hear about this gpm.
And thanks for sharing it.

Karin

GPM
So sorry about the outcome, I understand your feelings well and I truely admire your strength to end it for this poor gal. My condolences...K

An experience much like yours showed me the power of homeopathy and the lack of my knowledge....it inspired me to become a formal student of homeopathy.... maybe this experience was a last gift from your beloved mare... Denise

I am very, very sorry GPM, both for your loss and the terribly difficult experience you have undergone. She was so fortunate to have had you in her life. My thoughts are with you.

Contenta