I’m seeking help for my 8 year old son. Up to now, nothing has worked.

Background: I am his maternal aunt and adopted mother. He was born to my sister and her husband. Pregnancy went very smooth in spite of very poor pre-natal care. Birth father uses drugs/alcohol, in and out of jail. Delivery was great with no problems.

At age two, birth mother suddenly dies. My son remains with his birth father for the next year. During this time, he is severely neglected and abused.

At age three, son is placed with maternal grandparents. They are elderly. He remains with grandparents (my parents) for the next two years. During this time, they overly compensate by letting him get away with everything. He controls the household and very little discipline is enforced. Due to their age, there are limitations to child rearing. At this point, major behavior problems are revealed at pre-school and home. During this time, my husband and I continue to maintain a very close relationship with my son.

At age five, we are able to adopt my son. He comes to live with me and husband at 5.5 years of age. He’s ready to begin kindergarten.

For the next three years, he continues to have behavior problems both at home and school. Excels academically in private school, high academic achiever.

Current personality: Defies all adult authority. Will never do as he is told unless there is a threat to take away cartoons or computer. Parents, teachers and coaches have problems with him listening and following rules. He wants to control all adults. Does not like playing with toys. But, at times will act very immature, almost like a 3-4 year old. Though, extremely articulate and bright.

He never stops talking loudly. He has told me that he is afraid to stop because he “won’t be able to talk every again if he stops”. He is afraid to be alone. Very nervous and anxious. He paces and has body twitches. He clings to us and hovers over people. Does not give people space. Very needy and uncertain of our love. My son will not play with toys except electronic toys (computer, playstation, etc). He has virtually no imagination for play time.

Sleeping habits: Goes to sleep relatively easy. Sleeps throughout the night. But, must fall asleep with the light on. The light is shut off once he is asleep. No nightmares or bed wetting.

Eating habits: Eats all kinds of food. He would love to have more snacks if I allowed them, but I don’t. There is a limit on snack food. Drinks soda infrequently. Will not drink plain milk, it must be with syrup.
He eats three meals a day with moderate snacks in between. Does not have excessive thirst.

Body habits: Always hot and sweaty (even in cold weather). Removes his shirt, shoes and socks all the time. His bathroom habits have not changed. Stool tends to be hard but regular. Urination is normal. He reached milestones uneventfully (potty trained, using utensils, dressing himself, etc.) Falls very often or pumps into things. Does not pay attention his surroundings. Very impulsive with both mouth and hands, never thinks before acting.

Activities: He learned to bike ride, skate, swim, etc. with ease. But, does not follow team rules and the coaches.

Health: At age four he had a bad ear infection and cold that was remedied. At age seven, sudden onset of appendicitis. Surgery went well and recovery was unusually fast. There has been no colds or illnesses since that time. Hair, nails and teeth are very healthy. Weight and height is proportion and average. Does not take any medications. He takes several types of vitamins.

The real issues seem to involve his behavior problems and somewhat quirky personality issues. The non-stop talking, fidgeting and hovering seem to effect everyone because it seems to get on adult nerves.

Plese help us. I’m looking forward to your advice.

If you can find a good local homoeopath that would be best, otherwise I will help.

I have gone through the symptoms and find that he needs Phosphorus. I would like him to take Phos 200, one dose once only.
Coffee and colas should be avoided with this remedy.
And please, if you follow this advice, report back with all changes.

Note: Rep
Gen Awkward
Mind Impetuous
Mind fear dark
Mind fear alone
Appendicitis
Gen Twitching

If you are to take my advice you should have my email address in case you need to contact me with any acute symptoms.
It is thegreen@cwcom.net

Thank you. I will try Phos.

Please advise, how many Phos. should he take and for how long? Should he eat first before administering? I forgot this info.

Can he continue with his vitamin regime?

Also, another point is that he's impatient and does not take to kid-like surprises. He must know all details in advance, otherwise he becomes very nervous and anxious.

Once again, thanks.

He should take two Phos 200 tablets once only. This should be on a clean palate away from food and drink for 15 minutes.

The idea of the homoeopathic remedy is to stimulate a healing reaction which is why only a single dose is used.

His need to control is understandable since so many bad surprises must have happenned to him when he was younger. We will try Phos for now. There might be a NM layer but we will use Phos first.

To me, this looks like Stramonium - Paul Herscu's book describes the various manifestations of this remedy - including some really sweet kids. Rubrics are:
- fear alone, fear dark
- childish behaviour
- disposed to talk continuously (Douglass)
- twitching of body

However, I too think you should try to see a local homeopath if possible - ther's no substitute for seeing the patient in front of you.

[This message has been edited by Wexdoc (edited 11 February 2001).]

I am away from home with no rep but my first thoughts were Stramonium and then another thought came to mind of Agaricus so can you please check that one up Anna and see if I am way off mark. Where did you get the Phos from? I also thought of Medorrhinum.

[This message has been edited by Ricky (edited 11 February 2001).]

Here is more info:

My son is rarely angry with outbursts. In fact, he tends to lean towards the silly, smiling type. Though he's never agreeable especially with adults.

Also, he wakes up in the morning very happy.

His ears turn red frequently, has clear eyes but chapped lips. He picks at finger/toe nails. No nose picking.

He's very impatient and anxious. This will manifest itself with excessive talking and fidgeting.

Any input is appreciated.

Ricky, I noted my repertorisation in my post above.
The boy does not seem to me to express terror [Goes to sleep relatively easily...No nightmares or bedwetting] so much as insecurity which is why I prefer Phos to Stram.
Agar lacks the fears.
I cannot see the case for Med.

..and another thing ...

"He learned to bike ride, skate, SWIM, etc. with ease"

Not Stram.