Hi to all of you!

This is the second time I try to post this. Had the wrong password... So please don´t wonder if somehow this appears double.

I hope you can help me with my very good friend Peter. At the moment his life is really a mess and I´m -again- very worried about him.

At the moment his mother is at the hospital because she overexerted herself in caring for her family, especially for her husband. We have to exspect his death sooner or later...
Not that this is enough, Peter´s girl-friend decided to leave him. Of course that is her decision and she has of course the right to do that.
But now he is really falling deep, is desperate and suffering a lot.

So I´ll try to give you a description of Peter and perhaps any of you have suggestions :

Born 15.8.1971. His mother was I think about 42. One 16 years olderbrother, one older sister
I don´t know very much about his childhood. He never told me much about it. Only that he was overweighted a lot. But then he stopped eating everything he came near to and at the same time grew up to the height of 194 cm. That was at the age of 15/17. He then only weighted about +-80kg.
He was always very good at school. Also he learned to play chess. But after he won some championships he stopped playing and started playing table-tennis. Again the same thing. As soon he was good he stopped. Don´t know why.
I never saw him playing chess since I know him (1988).

Ingrowing toenail of the left big toe. He had several surgeries on it, but it reapears again and again. And he never stops to "treat" himself with a cissor and pincette. It hurts him, but he says he has to do it, because it gets better in this way...
Biting of nails untill there are allmost no nails left, allthough he stopped it for a bet. After he won the bet he started it emidiately again.
Otherwise he has wonderfull bright brown healthy hair.
Twice a hole in his membrane of the drum of the ear after his sister gave him a slap. Didn´t cure well, so that he had surgery twice on it.

Everything he starts working on he does very well. Things he organizes are going very good and he likes this organizing and -that may be my subjektiv sight of things- likes it to be in the middle of things. Doesn´t matter if that is environment-keeping-work or a culture event for several thousands people.

On the other hand if anything isn´t a full success he thinks he is alooser.
A very bad situaton was when he failed the first examn in his whole life. He was 24/25 at that moment and at that point I was the first time very worried about him. He couln´t handle this failure. He talked about he is nothing, not worth lifing. And -he lifes at the 17th floor- it would be so easy to open the window and just jump. Everything would be over then. Only -and I thank heaven for this- he lacks the courage.
When he repeated the test I had to spend the night with him. It was the only possibility for him to fall asleep. Having someone near to him.

Consolation is something he needs very much. He then starts wheeping, gets totally lost and at some point falls asleep.
Beeing alone aggravates. He then starts thinking, can´t think anymore and despairs.
When I call him in those moments we are just sitting at the phone talking allmost nothing. But for him it is important to know there is someone there for him.

I know him in this state from three failed partnerships - the first was the one between him and me, lasted nine years.
He is totaly desperate, suffers and suffers a lot. He then often repeats following sentences: My head is empty. Everything feels dead inside me. I can´t think anymore. I´m feeling sick (sometimes he even vomit then).
The last years he asked several times if I think he is a bad person. If he isn´t loveable.

The thing is, that he looses more and more friends. He gets an unfunny companion while going out in the evenings.
For example seven of us met last weekend after we haven´t met for a long time. Everybody studies elsewhere.
We sat there together, had a great time and it realy was a marvelous warm summerevening. He then started to ask me if we go to the cinema ( we often go to the cinema when we meet; he likes cinema very much, but rarely makes it to go there because he is allways bussy with something.) In the middle of all of our friends! Noboddy understood that.
And at the same afternoon, i just was visiting his parents (his mom wasn´t at the hospital at that moment yet)he came back home unexpectatly early. We talked at the phone the evening before and he told me how happy he is that we will meet again and we have to talk a lot. And what happened? We went to the lifing-room where he turned on the TV and fell asleep. For him that is OK...
He also falls asleep in the middle of parties where everyboddy has fun.

He was not allways like this and that´s the thing why I think he can be helped.

In general he is a perfectionist. He requires the best from others as he do from himself.
Still is very addicted to home allthough his parents can -of course- nothing do the way he would like them to do and he is 28.
In the mornings he is almost unbearable, but after midday he gets OK and then stays up till late in the night.
Very idle, allthough you wouldn´t think it if you see him.
Loves it to stay in the bathtube for hours

Food:
he eats no fruits, but drinks fruit-juice
likes his salad -if he gets it served at home- sour
stopped eating meat allmost totally the last years (though I´m not sure if thats not only to tease his mother...)
vegetables... if he gets them served yes
he can eat uncredible amounts at one time, but on the other hand forgets eating sometimes.

Skin:
a curious eruption mainly between his fingers. Started about 9 years ago when he still was in school. Sometimes there are occuring little waterfilled pustules which break open. then the skin desquamates ore better said cracks and the skin unter this is red. not too much itching, but he sucks on it and pulls of the old skin.
I never saw direct relation to stress. And also I haven´t found corrrelation to his emotional status.

Other surgeries: apendectomy

father: was wounded twice in the second world war, lost his left leg. Heart- attack at 54.
mother:allmost totally healthy till the last week, but had two or three abortions
brother: had a bad encephalitis, but only kept glasses as a result of this
sister: nothing I know of

This is a lot of information by now. Hopefully any of you can give me advice. The thing I really want to avoid is a first aggravation. I´m in Vienna, he is in Munich. Can´t just step by if it get´s worse. Takes at least 5 hours to get there.
Thats also the reason why I don´t want play try and error. And I don´t have the feeling that I could prescibe like Hahnemann tells us in Organon §2. I have some ideas, but don´t have the courage to give him a remedy I´m not sure of.

I´ll wait for your answers!

Best wishes

Iris

Hi GM!

Thanks a lot for your advice.
Most probably it is sil.
I asked him if he feels better driving the car, but he sais he allmost had an accident when he drove. Sounds like it is not amel. by cardriving...
He has white spots on his nail, and also on his front teeth.
I also remember now that he has to lay down when he gets an injection. Otherwise he faints. Also as often the speech is about needles and scalpels or even blood he gets sick and stopps the conversation.
From what I red from Shankaran he also seems to fit sil. This central idea of the image... that hits the point!
Nat.m. somehow also fits, but I gave it to him in a C30 about three years ago and really nothing happened.
He never had otherwise homeopathic treatment. For this I think he never had sil. before.
Of course I also red Ac.n. Think it doesn´t fit to him. I studied it a bit three weeks ago when I tried to find a remedy for my sister. For her it fits perfectly ...
So what do you think?
Sil or nat m ?
I´ll order both of them so he gets it as soon as possible.

Thanks a lot

Best wished

Iris

Hi again!

Just wanted to ask wich potencies I should order.
As far as I know I can order C200, LM30, Q32 or FC100M at my pharmaceut here in Austria.

Which is most recomendable?

Iris

Use Silicea, its the one, the others dont fit, and, besides if Natrium is on top as a layer, you never reach in with low potneces if on the mental leve. but i dont think that, i may lay under sil, use to be so.
Use LM 30. i would preferr , one M ,10 M, or CM.
But it will do.

Only three remedies are possible, except a fourth, and that is dependant on if he had silicea many years ago, and its Ac fl.
the rem that shows, is first of all Natrium mur, then ac n and silicea.
I would use Natr m first, as minimum 10 m, preferably in CM. one dose.
Does he have any spots on the nails?? If, its either ac n or silicea, if amel from driving a car, mentally, its ac n, and if not its silicea.the eruption on the fingers point to it.. but if had silicea many years ago, use ac fl 200 first, then after a month Ntr m.

[This message has been edited by GM (edited 20 June 2000).]

I have ordered a 10M in Germany which he got today.
I´m now curious which are the all day antidotes.
Too less experience and books by myself to know which are the ones to Sil.

Rehman's book The Encyclopedia of Relationships in Homoeopathy, should be at the hand of every homoeopath - gives all the antidotes, remedies and foodstuffs.
No food antidotes are listed there for silica, but in general choose warm food and drink for a silica constitution, and avoid alcohol and excessive salt.

Thanks Anna for your answer.
Believe me, the next book I´ll buy is one about remedies and their antidotes and relationships.
Only problem is that you can´t buy everything at once.

Just a little thing that puzzels me:
Peter took the remedy yesterday. When I talked to him he sounded much more lively. Clear voice.
Also he decided to drive home to his parents, which I suggested before but which he denied. He said they can´t help or understand me.
Then yesterday he said: I´ll go home, think they take care more of me than I get here.
He also had a meeting yesterday with his ex. Said it was a good meeting, although not too good, because the situation of separation still remains. New aspect got into here,-but already three days ago that he got known about it- because another guy, good friend of Peter is the actual reason. That hurted him very deeply, because that means overall total abuse of his confidence.
Last thing: he asked me if the improovement will keep on like this (so he must feel there an improovement). But he has the feeling/fear it won´t.

I´ll report any changes.

It works.just wait and see.